Smart ePants

  • Smart ePants
  • Smart ePants
  • Smart ePants

We’ve come a very long way from scribbling our autograph on till receipts, to the wonders of chip and pin and the speedy efficiency of today’s contactless payments. But digging around in your bag or pocket for cards – it’s all just a bit “clunky”. Meet Smart ePants.

A waterproof microchip stitched into the front and back of these comfortable cotton undies allows you to make secure payments with a hearty pelvic thrust or playful booty pop.

Touching in and out on the tube? Paying for a coffee? Now you can beat the daily grind with some actual bump and grind. Got a friend with ePants? Simply jump into their arms and wrap your legs around their waist to make an instant cash transfer.

Remember that time you forgot your wallet and you had to trudge home in the pouring rain, at 4am, drunk, with no shoes on, weeping, tired, hungry, repentant and alone? With Smart ePants you’ll never be caught short again, because unless you’re a deviant little piglet you probably aren’t going to forget to put on your underwear.

Please Note:

  • Compatible with all major credit cards, debit cards, Oyster cards, key fobs – just about any device that uses radio-frequency identification

Product Features:

  • Make secure payments with a gentle thrusting action or twerk
  • Waterproof microchip stitched into both sides of the pants
  • Always have cash close to hand
  • Effortless money transfers between other ePants wearers
  • Made from 95% combed cotton and 5% Elastine
  • Comfortable elastic waistband


  • Men’s:
    • S – 30/32″, M – 32/33″, L – 33/34″, XL – 34/35″
  • Women’s:
    • S – 8, M – 10/12, L – 14, XL – 15/16
Where to buy
Smart ePants

'tactless technology


%d bloggers like this: